A Good Read

Sefl-help, Self-discovery, and Self-fun Books

The Fine Art of Small Talk, by Debra Fine

Have you ever been tongue-tied at a party? Had trouble knowing what to say to someone you've just been introduced to? Not known how to break the ice? Hidden in the bathroom or parked by the buffet table to avoid all those strangers?

I have a solution for you, and it's Debra Fine's wonderful book, The Fine Art of Small Talk. I first discovered Debra's Fine Art of Small Talk when it was released as an audiotape in 1997. I've listened to that tape over and over, and found myself much more comfortable in all kinds of social situations. I've recommended it to dozens of other people, who had the same results. And the best part of it is, Debra is fun, lively and easy to read (or listen to).

The Fine Art of Small Talk offers practical advice on how to hold a conversation in every social situation, from the table of eight at a banquet, to lunch with the boss, to a cocktail party where you don't know a soul. Debra teaches you what clues to look for so you can connect immediately with that other person. She offers a list of lines you can use to start, continue, or end a conversation. She shows you how to avoid awkward silences and pregnant pauses. But for me, perhaps the biggest, most effective technique I learned was how to be a good listener. (That was before I got into coaching, where my listening skills were really honed.)

In the end, The Fine Art of Small Talk will take you from hiding in the bathroom to mingling with the crowd, easily and with confidence, not a single knot in your tongue.